No Longer in Doubt - Old Auditor Goes Public
I have been inspired by Marty Rathbun's recent article Stepping Out of Line to set an example for others who are waiting to go public.
There are more Scientologists going public every day about the abuses they have observed in the Church of Scientology. Some are public, some are staff, and some are Sea Org. Every person who speaks up gives the lie to the claims made by the current church management.
The vital statistics of Scientology auditors made and auditing completions are down and have been down for many years. The only statistic that is rising is empty buildings built as a facade to hide a dying church.
Many public and staff have recognized the lies, but few have had the courage to speak up. The few who have gone public have inspired a growing movement for reformation of scientology technology as in making it available to all who would use it regardless of what the existing church organization attempts to do.
For every Scientologist who has spoke up publicly there are hundreds more who have ventured to comment anonymously on the sites I read daily. I have remained among this number until today.
Most of us are hung up at Step 6 of the Doubt Formula, "Join or remain in or befriend the one which progresses toward the greatest good for the greatest number of dynamics and announce the fact publicly to both sides." We say we are not in Doubt anymore, but we hesitate to announce our disconnection from those who have turned our church into the most oppressive cult in years.
"It can occur that a person working up through the lower conditions can get hung up at Doubt and not be able to complete the formula. In such instances, a PTS condition or false data may be found to exist... When a person is faced with suppresssion, whether the actual suppression exists in present time or is a past suppression restimulated in present time, he is facing a counter-postulate. A problem is a prostulate--counter-postulate resulting in indecision. The first manifestation of and the first consequence of a problem is indecision. Therefore a PTS condition can hang up one at Doubt." -- LRH from the book Scientology Ethics
There are tens of thousands more who are not even able to bring themselves to comment on the Internet or to discuss their feelings with close friends or family members. Most of these are not able to admit they are in Doubt for fear that it will come up in session and affect their "eligibility" for further services.
All of the people who are afraid to speak up are PTS and are unable to handle or disconnect. Wow! Were we not trained intensively that being PTS is worse than being terminally stupid? Well, our continuous hang up at Doubt is one sign we are connected to a suppressive and it has paralyzed our ability to think for ourselves.
Perhaps the new church of Miscavige expects us to be PTS so that we will meekly follow orders that are counter survival. It certainly has worked on the Int Management people. How long before staff and public voluntarily rout themselves into RPF type projects to show fealty to Dear Leader?
Being PTS means losing your gains, making big mistakes, getting ill and dying. It seems that a lot of that is going around right now within the church of Scientology. Too many OTs are dying of cancer, while others are committing suicide. Some are committing murder, which is not a desirable stat for a church.
Meanwhile, families are sending their members off to Flag for more auditing in the fond hope that they will get gains from the GAT style auditing and heavy sec checks that are currently in vogue at Flag and elsewhere. Happy thetans going meekly into the meat grinder! What results would you expect for auditing done in a suppressive environment?
I have spoken to my friends who are still on lines and have urged them to read my website and find out what is going on so that they can protect themselves from the suppression in their environment. What I have failed to do is to set a good example by speaking out publicly as my self.
I have not been in doubt about the church for at least 15 years. I just have failed to complete the Doubt Formula by announcing the fact publicly to all concerned.
I am overdue in this regard because I had already notified various Flag and FSSO personnel that I was quite happy with the services I received in the past but the actions of top management have altered the Church beyond recognition and I saw nothing that would warrant spending any more time getting services.
My website possiblyhelpfuladvice.com contains my observations about the Church of Scientology and its Founder. I have been as clear as possible about what I have found and what it means. I now need to sign my name to it so all will know what I stand for and what I am supporting in the way of a possible future course of action.
I feel that there is some value in the technology that can be salvaged, but I see little that can be salvaged of the church itself. There are too many lies embodied in the organizational structure and in the purposes which it purports to achieve.
I am dedicated to helping those outside the church who are rekindling failed purposes and hope to contribute to the growth and stability of independent scientology and related subjects.
If there is anything I can do to help someone leave or recover from the suppressive environment of the Church of Scientology, send me an email at
This e-mail address is being protected from spambots. You need JavaScript enabled to view it
I am truly out and will do what I can to help others get out.
David St Lawrence Grad V, OT VII
aka: Old Auditor
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Comments
First I'd like to say bravo for coming out of the shadows!
However, let me just say that for me the condition of doubt is a wrong condition.
Since I never had any doubts about the workability of Scientology!
As far as I'm concerned it is the organization that is below doubt. Actually in treason or lower and has become in fact a suppressive group.
So I simply disconnected.
However, I have chosen not to announce this fact publicly because I do not want to create unnecessary antagonism for the time being.
I drifted quietly away; still in comm with my Scientologist friends in and out of the church.
I get flack from those in that are aware of my connectons with those that are out, because "they are all SPs or Squirrels."
And the ones that are out are perfectly content to grant beingness and there is no pressure or even encouragement to get official. Why how novel..they just leave it to me to decide when ad how. And the ones in the church continue to utter the "cult speak" about the "entheta".
David, well done on getting out and going public.
Some readers took this to mean I was saying they are PTS because they have not gone public. There are many who no pay attention to the church and anyone in it.
If you are being careful and have to watch what you say about the church or about David Miscavige, then your association with the church is putting you in a tone level that approximates fear. That is not a good thing.
If you have to hide your relationships with those who have spoken out, you are being forced to have withholds from those in the church or those you work with, and that is not a pro-survival situation.
Regardless of all of the hoopla that the church assigns to being PTS (while they make you PTS), PTSness is basically a technical condition of being connected to something or someone that puts you in fear.
It's not an all or nothing situation, if you are being put in fear because of your connection with the church, you are the effect of that connection, even if you do not acknowledge it.
Ask yourself these questions, "What happens if I ask questions about Heber Jentszch or about the new definition of FN?"
"What happens if I mention what I have read on this website?"
Do you get shown references or are you routed to ethics and get sec checked?
If you are still unable to determine whether you are PTS or not, consider what happens when you wish to take time away from courses or auditing to put your other dynamics in order.
If you are free to come and go as you please, you are definitely not PTS.
If you find that you are indeed PTS, it is not a badge of shame as the church has made it to be. It is merely a non-optimum condition that you can do something about.
Read my website possiblyhelpfuladvice.com for more information you might want to consider.
I actually could re-do Grade I solely on my time spent in the CofS!
You are spot on here and I thank you for coming out and sending your free theta into the universe for me to grab hold of!
Realizing so many counter-postulates that were stuck here, I can move to ACTION and not be stuck anymore.
Thank you again.
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