Xavier Jarquin, suspected informant for David Miscavige

This article is Part II of "David Miscavige's Suspected Informant." Click here to read that article first. 

Here are just a few of the communications from Xavier Jarquin, suspected informant for David Miscavige against independent Scientologists. The purpose of this article is not retribution. A "vendetta" is motivated by a false or evil purpose that has been brought to life and is therefore destructive. The purpose of this article is EDUCATION for you, so you know what to look for and can spot any plants from miles away.

Xavier has put out 14,180 words in just 8 days, December 9 to 17. And this is just the small portion I’ve been cc’d on. At our end, there was only the Five Dastardly Words of Death: “Xavier is likely a plant” written by Dan Koon on Marc Headley’s facebook wall.

Note that last night, Xavier was up writing, writing, writing these poison pen letters around the clock.

“Me a plant . . . now, that's funny!!!!” -- Xavier Jarquin

Based on my own general policy of exposing the guilty, I have not fixed Xavier’s typos. As Xavier put it, “...despite all that's transcurred, I wish u nothing but peace in your heart.”

And please take to heart Xavier’s warning, to “take whatever actions to make sure that all that each of you contacted passing on any vilifaction or black PR about me, is given the right information” if you can make any sense of this at all.

Written by Thoughtful

QUOTED EMAIL TRAFFIC FROM XAVIER:

Following is the text of emails and posts from Xavier Jarquin that have not been altered:

Sent: December 9, 2009 9:29:13 PM CST

Dear Steve (and Dan),   Hello.  

Frankly, I am saddened to see the last two sentences of this posting by Dan Koon (on Marc Headley's wall, of all places, as a concerned friend just alerted me to. I've placed it in bold letters below):  

"Dan Koon Gawd, Marc, I bet the speechwriters at Int had this kind of material for their NY Event. I can see the graphics now. Straight up and vertical! By the way, Xavier is likely a plant. Ask Steve. November 23 at 4:52pm"  

Needless to say, I'll call Dan myself, Steve, and I would have called you too, but I did not keep your phone when u last called me, so I've only your email. So if you'd like to call me back and overtly confront me with WHY you think I'm a plant, if u in fact think or suspect so, maybe we could have a civil and truthful conversation about that. All I can tell each of you now, is that:  

a) This kind of third partying, falsely accusing, rumor-mongering and vilification with your fellow ex-SO members out here is, among other things, exactly, yet EXACTLY what the DM/Cof$/OSA camp would want you to be engaging in. Don't u see?? You're going effect of their bs, sickening, game --- and have, in part, started acting like them, Steve, Dan. Please get back to battery, I beg u.  

b) I am unequivocally n-o-t a plant, and u can verify that to your heart's content (and the fact that u think or suspect I am/was, other than it's natter, untrue and offensive to me, is downright outlandish, as I've NO contact with the Church since I left it for good mid 2008 -- and I've NO reason to, at all, either (i.e. I've no kids and I've no Scientologist relatives whatsoever, in or out of Sea Org, Class V orgs or anywhere in the the Cof$, and I would NEVER do their dirty work, not for a million bucks, nor for anybody/anything that has to do with Scn, the SO or LRH, all of which I consider fraudulent, at least to a large degree (and I know that the latter is different than your views, and I can only expect you to respect my views --- and I do respect yours, I can assure u of that). It's just NOT my gig, man, and never will be, at all. It sort of turns my stomach to even think about it.  

c) You're free to believe me or not, or look into it as u so wish, but it's certainly not ok for anybody to natter, third party or speak behind my back. It is a most basic human right to confront the accused with the accuser, to objectively provide evidence for any judgment or accusation.  

If u think that just because I called Dan about Yael, and then, after seeing your latest article on her that u put up on your site, called you, I can  only tell you that, whether you know it or not, you are in a state of  paranoia. U see, I was never trying to defend Yael, whether she did write that affidavit as published or not, I was simply trying to get the facts, at least as objectively as you guys knew of them, for myself, that's all. Don't let your imagination, and whatever else, make some- thing else out of this plain is-ness, Steve and Dan. U've blown this up.  

Now, some degree of paranoia, or whatever u want to call it, does  naturally set in when one's been contacted or impinged upon by false, suppressive or PTS people, and seeing that at least you, Steve, has  been out there on the front lines of this public protest against DM's unjustifiable crimes and abuses, I can, to be totally fair to you, grant you that you may have been contacted by others who in fact were  either plants, SP, PTS or with some hidden or evil agenda. So, while being in that frame of mind, u made the mistake of thinking of me as another possible plant. Not that this justifies your actions and third party, yet it may be a technical and ethics related reason for it. And I forgive you each, Steve and Dan, as I'm not into holding grudges, but this isn't the point --- as you're doing more harm than good to yourselves when you engage in this kind of third partying and false accusations.    

Yet, Steve (and Dan, and whomever else u guys are rumoring to that  "Xavier may be a plant"), I urge you to be objective about things, about me and this whole matter of plants. And also, to please chill out, and to act with respect to those of us who in fact are not plants, or anything remotely of the sort. Please realize that just because:  

a) that after reading the first article posted on your site (re Yael's treasonous affidavit statement) I called Dan asking about Yael months ago (as I knew he lives closer to her and had been in touch with both her and Pablo Lobato. When I called, Dan told me that after he himself found out about what Yael had supposedly said in her affidavit, that he had  gotten in touch with Yael herself and that she told him that "they" [Tommy Davies, OSA or s/body in the C of S] had changed, and Dan told me, in brief and to the best of my memory, that he believed what Yael told him and and that he respected that she was doing this cycle so she could be in touch with her elderly parents in the S.O., etc.) what she had written, and that she had n-o-t written what was published). I called Dan out of sheer shock of how an ex-acquaintance could have done such a hypocritical and harmful act of treason towards her fellows and herself, and  

b) that I called you, after your 2nd article many, many weeks later than the first article, asking you to tell me your side of the story on Yael --- as the article was/is very emphatic and accusatory, so I was again, a bit outraged, and also quite surprised that between the time of the first article and this latter one, neither Yael, nor Dan Koon, nor anybody, had clarified the matter to you (as Dan did to me, at the time, as I go over above). Excuse me if me calling to ask you about this and tell you (as I did on the phone back then to you) what Dan had told me ---- all said in a straight, calm and non-third party manner at all, even after you, out of the blue, started asking me in quite an antagonistic way, if I was working for the Church (and u specified names, etc.) and other such things. I only concluded to myself that you must've had some pretty long days lately, and that plants and other PTS/SP type of people must have been hitting your lines recently, and so you were unusually wary or paranoid. Yet I thought of this with empathy and care, and n-o-t out of disdain, hate, or any out-rud or bad wish towards you. And I mean that, Steve, u should know that.  

c) If u think that just because I no longer share your beliefs in the Tech, LRH or the Bridge (as stated to you and others in an non-make-wrongy way, quite a while back --- while also acknowledging that there are parts of LRH's tech that are quite workable and useful, back then and always).  

----- If u believe that due to either one of the above, or due to something else, that I'm a plant, then all I can tell you, my friend, is to think again, to extro- vert yourself and to be objective and fair, and not just to me, but to yourself and to your own cause (LRH and his philosophy and technology, pure and unadulterated).  

Like I said, once you reflect on this a bit, and u have the time, I'd appreciate your call, Steve. If u don't reach me, please leave me a voicemail with your phone number, and I'll call u back when I can. Though ultimately I am "my own person" and don't truly care what others think (as I know who I am and know when I'm acting or acted ethically or not, and can self-correct myself in that), I would like you to truly communicate with me, directly and openly, and not behind my back. That goes for you, Steve, for Dan, and for whom- ever else is now involved in either rumor-mongering about me actively or entertaining rumors about me without openly contacting me, if that is the case. So, Steve & Dan, I only wish that that u find in yourself the desire to be truly honest and straight, with me, with yourself and with the philosophy you still belief and uphold, for your own integrity and sanity, for each of your sakes, not mine. Get in touch when u can. I wish you both the very best.

Best Regards, Xavier

==================================

Posted on Steve Hall’s facebook wall December 10:

Steve, please see my email, and my comment on Dan's and Marc Headley's wall. I ask of you to stop the false accusations, the third party and the rumor-mongering on me, as I'm no plant, spy, or a-n-y such ridiculous thing. You are going effect of the game that the C of $ people, plants or not, are playing on you, Steve,... whether you care to admit it or not. And I say this kindly. So please stop doing so, and stop vilifying me as part of it, that's all I ask. I've never harmed you or your cause, yet you're damaging both yourself by engaging in this kind of behavior with me, so please get in touch with me, extrovert, reach clear thinking on this matter, and be big enough to retract yourself with each and everyone to whom you've spread this false accusation of me. Please STOP, and call me. I don't bite, and I've NO hidden agenda.
==================================

Sent: December 10, 2009 1:05:17 AM CST

Tks, Terri -- and your point is well taken. Too much! (Me a plant . . . now, that's funny!!!!)  
 
I just hope for Steve and Dan's sake, and their own cause, that they both get OFF this type of behavior, and realize that besides the fact that it is totally wrong-targetting, it is harming their own reputation, cause and, even more importantly, their inner beingness. Let's get back on target and in true valence, folks, that's all I humbly ask (Dan, and Steve, again, you're free to contact me anytime for any in-ARC clarifications and comments; you both have my phone number and email. Just keep in mind that I'm busy too, and this is not something I'd like to make a meal out of, as it's already taken up what I consider too much of my time, though it needs to be righted. And once you are duly satisfied as to be not being a plant, however u wish to do that rapidly, for your own sake, please be humble and true-to-yourself (and the tech and LRH) enough, to retract your earlier false statements re me, with each and every person that you've spread them to, and also publicly. Don't let me do this for you, Dan and Steve; please get off the paranoia and duly practice your own standard tech application and exercise your very own personal integrity, for real, from now on. I'm not asking for too much here.
 
Love,
Xavier

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Sent: December 10, 2009 1:26:07 AM CST

Dan,
 
As u can see below, and as I told u at your own Wall at FB, it was Sinar who alerted me off your comment on Marc's wall --- though if I would've been in Marc's profile, I could've seen it myself, as I also told you. I told you his identity as a) it seemed to be a big deal to u, for whatever dumb and irrelevant reason and b) Sinar wasn't trying to do any harm, or 3rd party either one of u guys, and so I know he doesn't mind me revealing his identity to both of you. He is totally irrelevant to the issue at hand.
 
So please don't also wrong-target Sinar, do squirrel invests on him, or much less start up rumous on him too --- as I can assure u that if either one of u end up doing that, or continue vilifying me without fully retracting what you've spread, most of your own current friends will become ex-friends, as they will for sure think that both of you have gone mad, or lost all sense of ethics and direction, or both.
 
Now, though I may sound a bit upset and unpleasant, I hope u understand why, and know that I truly don't mean u any harm, and I simply wish you to be fair, honest and well-grounded in your views and actions, whether it was with me or with any other of us "out here." We, no matter whether we are scientologists or not anymore, are N-O-T the target, NOR the priority sphere of action; your target, if u so have one or want to have one, that is, are DM and those that forward or hold his suppressive behavior in place. Pls stick to them.
 
Regards,
Xavier

==================================

Sent: Thu, Dec 10, 2009 4:18 pm

Dear Janis (and other dear and true friends both CCed and BCCed),

 Hi!

This is an appeal for some actual help from you personally, and from whomever else wants to actually lend a hand and stand up for a friend (me . . . in this particular case and time). 

As u by now know, Steve Hall and Dan Koon (at least) have been spreading false accusations about me to others in the ex-SO commu- nity of ours. It's unknown how long this has gone on for, yet I think it's gone for at least 3 weeks or so, as that's when I last talked to Steve, and he already seemed to be on a roll (paranoic, overall). Steve and Dan were just acquaintances of mine, not close friends, yet still, this does not justify their actions at all.

Now, whatever I am, or I'm not, one thing I know is for sure: I am n-o-t a plant! Not for the C of $, Tommy Davies, DM or any of his croonies, nor for anybody else in or out of Scientology or the SO. I could never do such a thing, and the thought of doing so, or any "deal" never even crosssed my mind. And even if I had some dishonesty or greed in me, I've absolutely NO interest in doing the Bridge of the C of S, I've no kids, or relatives inside the SO or Scn, I'm not even declared, etc. I've NO gain in doing such a thing, not now, not ever. Besides, as gone over, I could never live with myself, not for a day, no matter what the price.

Anyways, if u believe in me and care enough for me as a friend, now it's the time to stand up for me. Why am I asking u this now? Well, because both Steve and Dan are refusing to take full responsibility for their damaging actions, and instead, as far as I can see, are going backwards. Steve has now blocked me in Facebook, and despite my emails and my later appeals for peace and true communication, he has not even emailed me, much less called me. Neither has Dan, on both counts (though he did write some brief lines in FB, yet still acting in an antagonistic/out of valence manner).

Also, Marty Rathbun, who I had as a friend in FB, mysteriously took me off his Friends list (x time ago, I've not been checking). Today, I see that he's blocked me (as I went to his profile and wrote him a [private] email on this situation yesterday, and today I can't even see or access his profile). Janis, u saw the email I sent Marty, and it was a calm, cool and collected one, an appeal to reason; I wrote  it to him as Steve and Dan were/are continuing to be irrational, and I know he's in touch with both of them, and they look up to him too (and correctly so, as even though I don't share or agree with all of his views, Marty's doing a great job standing up for his beliefs and those of many others, truly helping them, exposing abuses and lies, etc.). In any case, Marty's now seemingly siding with Steve and Dan in this vilification of me.      

Anyway, I leave it up to you, Janis, and each of you, as to how you choose to "stand up for me." All I ask is that u do your part in what- ever way you judge as appropriate, as ethical and correct, that's all.

But please don't do nothing, just out of fear for getting your hands dirty or "messed up in this" --- as I can only tell you that this kind of attitude and detachment is a two-edge sword, as when s/body comes after you, for whatever reason and whomever he/she is, you sure will want your true friends and family to not only stand by you but to also stick out for you, when needed.

Meditating & praying 4 peace counts! U need not go "out of your way", or make a big deal out of this, no; just do something, as it sure ain't right, I tell you, and just as it happened to me, it could happen to you, or anyone of us, unfortunately. Use your contacts, your wit and your honesty. You can write to Dan, Steve, Marty, Mike (Rinder), and/or whomever else u judge best, and/or you can post something in whichever one of the various sites, denouncing this vilification, this lack of clear thinking and wrong-targetting.

I of course would want you to be civil, yet pls get the point across. I can assure you I would do it for you, and I can also tell you that in some cases, whether I've told you or not, I already have --- as I truly respect and love my friends, seeing that friends are true blessings, and very little, if anything, is more precious ---- I can  tell you that I don't allow them to be abused or spoken ill of, no.

Anyway, thank you for being my friends. I know that you will each do something, as you judge best. Know that I'm not big- time "worried" or in some sort of despair or depression about this (or anything for that matter!), heavens, no. I know that the truth always prevails, . . . I just want to speed up that process(!!) :-)

Know that as long as I live, I'll always be there for you.  Take good care.  

Peace, Xavier  

PS. Email Addresses of Steve and Dan, in case u don't have them: Steve Hall: _____@____________.com Dan Koon: ______@_________.com Marty Rathbun can be reached at his site or in Facebook, and as to Mike Rinder and others --- I bet you anything that u, Janis, have their email addresses too! :-)

Last but not least, I posted the following in 2 parts in Dan Koon's Wall at FB, today (this shall be one of my very last public postings about this there, hopefully):

"Not heard from neither of you. That is plain cowardly and covert. Call or email me, yet it's best u call me; I don't bite, Dan; and I didn't start this war. The more either one of you don't get in true communication with me and don't come to terms with what you've done with true humbleness and remorse (from the heart), the more you will each hurt your reputation and whatever else u stand for, And please tell Steve to do the same. I can be a warrior and pound him in the ground too (everyone has that potential inside them) if he keeps at it and doesn't retract --- and I strongly suggest that neither one of you try me at that --- yet I much rather he extrovert, reflect, chill out and get in true communication with himself, and then with me, as soon as possible, and retract his statements in full to all concerned.

U each, intentionally, have done, or attempted to, do some damage to me and my reputation with my friends and acquaintances (as I've been finding out with more friends that I've contacted recently, and though none really believed it, u have/had placed a slight degree of uncertainty about me on the minds of some acquaintances, and that's totally, TOTALLY not ok to do and doesn't set right with me whatsoever.. It's libel, slander, harassment, vilification, abuse, degradation, etc. I sure as heck expected a lot more objectivity and fair-mindedness out of each of you. I hope, for your own sakes, that u each take full and utter responsibility for what you've done, and soon.

The truth always prevails --- and it will either hunt you or set you free. 
Your choice. Hint: Thus far, you're setting yourself up so that the truth hunts you, and buries you. Advice: See that I'm not what you've accused me of, retract, change course -- the sooner the better."  

==================================

Posted on Dan Koon’s facebook Dec 11, 2009 9:44 PM

Xavier Jarquin: Dan, that's pretty hilarious, all aside from sickening, that you're telling Marc Headley "Xavier is likely a plant. Ask Steve." -- right on his wall. All I can tell u is that I am not one, and that I haven't had any contact with any C of $ people since I stopped being a scientologist and got my refund about a year and ...a half ago, as it's well known, as I've no reason to, at all. I thought highly of you, and Steve, until now, I'm sorry to say. May both of you, and anyone else engaging in this degrading behavior (degrading to both yourself and others), deal with this with true integrity, and make it right, for your sake, not mine --- as I know what I am and what I'm not, and so do my true friends.
==================================

Posted on Dan Koon’s facebook Dec 11, 2009 9:49 PM
Dan Koon: Xavier, Who alerted you to my comment on Marc's wall? The concerned friend? If you're not a plant, great. I'll be happy to make it up and admit that my suspicions were unfounded and retract them.

==================================

Posted on Dan Koon’s facebook Dec 11, 2009 at 11:55 PM
Xavier Jarquin: The concerned friend was Sinar Parman; u can ask him yourself, he just happened to see it on Marc's wall. Yet why are u making an issue as to who alerted me to your comment on Marc's wall?? I could've seen it myself, u know, as u made it a public matter. So please don't make this another wrong-target, vilifying issue, with him or with me. Be CIVIL, Dan!

If u have or had suspicions, why don't u first apply the very basics of Scn and whatever else u believe in and contact me, by phone, email or in person, as u wish? Why the coward talk to s/body else and behind my back?? This is not, I repeat, NOT the Dan I thought I knew, AT ALL.

You've allowed your affinity to be alloyed, this time by Steve Hall, and have let your imagination run wild, and then, u took it one step further and publicly and falsely accused me. U, being as trained as u were, and such an old timer overall, should've known better than to let your imagination get the best of you and to act so impuslively and irresponsibly. Do what u wish, yet realize that by engaging in this witch-hunt type behavior, you're hurting yourself, and your own friends and cause, more than u will ever hurt me. And if u have any questions or concerns, or want to clarify anything, as long as u act with true humility and kindness, u can call me anytime. I know who I am, and so do my true friends. I wish u well.

==================================

Posted on Dan Koon’s facebook Dec 12, 2009, 5:00 PM
Xavier Jarquin: Not heard from neither of you. That is plain cowardly and covert. Call or email me, yet it's best u call me; I don't bite, Dan; and I didn't start this war. The more either one of you don't get in true communication with me and don't come to terms with what you've done with true humbleness and remorse (from the heart),... the more you will each hurt your reputation and whatever else u stand for, And please tell Steve to do the same. I can be a warrior and pound him in the ground too (everyone has that potential inside them) if he keeps at it and doesn't retract --- and I strongly suggest that neither one of you try me at that --- yet I much rather he extrovert, reflect, chill out and get in true communication with himself, and then with me, as soon as possible, and retract his statements in full to all concerned.

==================================


Posted on Dan Koon’s facebook Dec 12, 2009, 6:00 PM
Xavier Jarquin: U each, intentionally, have done, or attempted to, do some damage to me and my reputation with my friends and acquaintances (as I've been finding out with more friends that I've contacted recently, and though none really believed it, u have/had placed a slight degree of uncertainty about me on the minds of some acquaintances, and that's totally, TOTALLY not ok to do and doesn't set right with me whatsoever.
It's libel, slander, harassment, vilification, abuse, degradation, etc. I sure as heck expected a lot more objectivity and fair-mindedness out of each of you. I hope, for your own sakes, that u each take full and utter responsibility for what you've done, and soon. 

The truth always prevails --- and it will either hunt you or set you free. 
Your choice. Hint: Thus far, you're setting yourself up so that the truth hunts you, and buries you. Advice: See that I'm not what you've accused me of, retract, change course -- the sooner the better.
==================================

Sent: December 13, 2009 6:45:00 PM CST

Dear Steve, Dan (and all concerned),
 
Hello. I just want u to know that I'm moving on, I forgive you and Dan fully for whatever u may have said about me to whomever. This is your responsibility to clarify and correct if u choose to do so. You have your own personal integrity, with God (or the 8th Dynamic) and with yourself and your true friends, and I have mine, and I know, as u guys should also know, that the truth, the real truth always, in the end, prevails.
 
If I ever said anything that offended u in any way, whatever that was (though I don't know,
personally), u have my honest apologies, as I never intended such. I'm no plant, or anything of the sort, yet, if u care to believe that, or whatever else about me, that's your
business. Just know that I never did anything to hurt you or your cause, and that I do respect your beliefs and goals, whether I agree with them in whole or in part, or not.
 
Now, if u ever wish to clarify this whole matter with me personally, u can, so long as u promise to be objective and decent in your approach. And I promise u I will be too. I don't know how u came to whatever conclusions u came up about me, or how my words or whatever else I supposedly did or said, got twisted or confused resulting in u and/or Dan thinking I am or may be a plant, but all I can tell u, whether u believe it or not, is nothing can be further from that --- as I've NO relations with DM, OSA, the C of S or any of their henchmen. Their human rights abuses are NOT ok with me at all, and never will be, and neither are those of anyone on the outside that side with them in any way (be it what Yael did, and/or whomever else).
 
Let the above be very clear to you. Anyway, you're free to contact me, whether in person or by phone or email (u have my contact info) if u ever choose to do so, now or later. I am an open book in all this and in general, as I've got nothing to hide. All I ask is that u be objective and truly keep your personal integrity in and those LRH basics on truth, ethics and justice, and respect, when dealing with me or "the issue with me", whatever that is. And u have my word that I will keep these fundamentals in too.  
 
I wish you, Dan, and all others related to this or not, true inner peace, along with health and prosperity all around.
 
Regards,
 
Xavier  

==================================

Sent: Monday, December 14, 2009 2:47 PM

Dear Jim,

Hi again. Just for your info on this whole matter, I am forwarding to you the email that I had sent to Steve Hall (and Dan Koon) this past Thursday, once I was alerted by Sinar Parman that Dan had posted this vilification of me in something he wrote to my friend Marc Headley, in, of all places, on his Wall in Facebook. This was a total shock to me and still is, as, though I was never close friends with either Steve or Dan, they were long time acquaintances, and I had always considered them to be objective and calm, cool and collected type people.

Anyway, even though neither Steve nor Dan decided to respond back, or call me or contact me in any way, shape or form to clarify anything with me, or even confront me with whatever "circumstantial evidence" they had of their allegations, as u saw in my last email to them (the one u responded to me about yesterday), I forgive them both (truly, from the heart) and I wish them nothing but true peace and wellness. I just hope they come to their senses as to me and in whatever other similar cases, so they stay on their own target, and not get into witch hunts or other DM and SP/PTS type behavior, as otherwise they'd be acting like the very people they're protesting about (DM and company), and would be doing, like I told them both, exactly what they would like them to be doing: in-fighting with those out here, and so forth. So I'm simply sending u the email below so u had the whole email thread on "my cycle", as I realized you didn't.

So u know I got left the Int Base in early '95 to the PAC RPF (I consider myself lucky, as by all accounts it sure got totally nuts, and much worse later.) I then got FBed out of the SO mid 2001. I remained a public Scientologist until early 2008. At that point, after quite a number of life-changing events that got me thinking enough "outside of the box" I did a lot of digging in (using my own intuition and the LRH nvest tech and Data Series I knew), and concluded, among other things (long story) that I did not want to be a Scientologist anymore and part of the C of S field. So, knowing that my then girl-friend (who also left, and stayed out) and I had money unused in a Flag account, we asked for it back, and after some good intention and push-through, we got it back 3 or some months later, and that was that....

And I've never looked back, and moved on. Now, though I have many acquaintances and friends (Independent Scientologists, ex- or non-scientologists, some of which u can see in my Facebook page and some not), I am mostly concentrating in rebuilding my life and a career, etc., though I still keep some of my dear and true friends, like Janis Grady, Terri (her sister, both 2 of the original 4 LRH Messengers, as u know) and a number of other great guys and gals. So there u have it.  C'est tout ("That's all," in french, as u probably know). Needless to say, feel free to ask me anything.    

Last but not least . . .  yet on a separate note, know that in the many years after u left the Base I've thought about you many times, both remembering the good times, and the TONS of laughs we had together, along with your kindness and also, not forgotten, your standard tech application as a Cram Off in Qual S, and other things of the sort. Thanks SO much for all that ton of theta, Jim! And may life grant u many, many blessings, and peace.

Take good care, Xavier

PS. That email to Steve, and Dan, they never answered.

==================================

Sent: Monday, December 14, 2009 11:52 PM

Dear Jim,

Yes, after all these years!

Now, my answer to your question:

No, I am not a Scientologist anymore. I hope u respect that fully, as much as I respect u still being one, Jim. That's real important to me before we go much further too.  Reasons? A bit too long for an email line I'd say, but I'm willing to go over them over the phone one of these weekends with you, if u'd like, so long as you're not challenging and again, are respectful of my realizations and decision on the matter. There isn't one reason, there's several, and it's some- thing that hapened in layers, over a long period of time. I just pulled back a lot of strings and outpoints, and these went much, much further than DM and his current 30-year oppressive, criminal, violent and alter-isy regime; that's just  what I realized for myself, but let me tell u, a) I'm very respectful of those of us old timers that are still Scientologists and b) I'm really, really NOT interested on dividing lines, alienation or discrimination (etc.) between those that are ex-Scientologists and those that are (both being outside of the C of $' grip and not being a direct party to DM's fiasco anymore, and still blind in full, that is) --- so long as they lead ethical lives and so forth, if u know what I mean. So I hope u dig and respect this, as much as I would always respect you, and  very much keep a high affinity line for you, no matter what u believe in or not.

I'm not into anything that claims to have THe only salvation tech, or that claims to have THE only Source, and that is extremely "futuristic" as to its salvation and enlightenment approach. I knew and know my policy and tech and I can only tell u what I went through, yet I don't claim that s/one could not find THE truth, or could not become awakened or enlightened (or whatever u may want to call it) through the application of Scientology to himself and life. Yet, there were/are  way, way too many outpoints for me to stick with it, the least of which is the fact that one is never, never able to see true research (valid and scientific type research), and just a few glimpses of what it m-a-y have been, if so, or just LRH's report or summary of it (and I can tell u that I had one of the highest security  clearances around up at Int, being in WDC, and I sure looked for it, yet never found it, no matter who I asked or what I looked, after thousands and thousands of pages). Anyway, Jim, please, PLEEEZZZZ don't take any offense in my  comments here, as they are most definitely not meant to offend or disrespect, and I'm telling u a) 'cause I know the caliber of being u are and I trust u and  b) u asked! :-)  Alright? More whenever we talk live. Cell: 310-___-____.

Anyway, if u'd like, I can break it down for you more, by phone at some point.

Warm Regards,

Xavier

==================================

Sent: December 15, 2009 3:45 AM

Jim, 

You're welcome, buddy. Well. see if the following answer is thorough enuf for ya, at least for now.

As to your question, no, I've no problem with it. PC side I did up to Grade IV and some NED, and read on Clear 2-3 times yet never got a CCRD. Other than that lots of FPRD and Sec Checking. Training wise, basically, Book I up to Class IV, Sec Checker Crse, FPRD Crse, HRD Auditor course, RTC (D/IG Tech) pass on metering (twice), and several others, including the Sup and Word Clearer courses, and a Cram Off Mini-Hat. Admin/Ethics wise, etc. wise is way too much to remember but here's some hightlights: Products 0 and I (SO Basics) twice, KTL, LOC, Student Hat (both the pre- GAT and the GAT one), Ethics Specialist (the one for the SO, which is more extensive), PTS/SP Course, Most of the OEC and the Mgmt Series (with Vol O twice, the earlier one and the latest one, with a much larger volume), Elementary DSEC, lots of LRH Messenger hatting, LRH Hats Project hat, Hubbard Electrometer Circuit Board Assembly Hat, Soldering Hat and a few other varied specialist hats for various posts, pjts and missions, crammed within an inch of my life for years by the AVC Int Cram Offs in tons of Admin tech, with mega amounts of clay demos, drills and practicals and so forth. I also saw all tech (up to the Solo Auditor level) and all Div 6 films at least half a dozen times, if not more. All aside from reading a ton of "Highly Confidential" LRH traffic, Advices on about everything imaginable. Plus quite a few projects and (SO) Missions experience, tons of LRH translations work into Spanish (WIS, Handbook, films, etc.), Msn Ops hat, various Programs Ops hats, WDC Battleplan I/C Hat, etc., etcetera...

Before I "retired" as a Scientologist, the last hat I wore "out here" was an Admin Tech Consultant for an LA Wise affiliated company, of which I nearly  single-handedly regged and delivered the highest amount of GI and VSD that this company had done in their entire 30 year history, and I had quite a lot of commends from posts/hats like that, along with contributions of both time and $ to orgs, particularly the Valley and the Pasadena org. Before I left the Int Base I had quite a few commends two, two from LRH himself prior to him dropping his body, and then from top CMOI/RTC execs (not from COB himself, funnily enough; others, at least back then, truly validated outstanding production and real (Scn delivery) stats. Left in early '95. So, anyway, whether you find it strange or perplexing that I then applied a ton of the above, plus my own intuition and others findings too, to investigate not only the current regime, but the very subject and its Founder and that, after a lot of findings, realizations and the like, I decided to stop being both a Scientologist (being that I was NO stranger to the tech or its beginnings and happenings), that is what happened, and that's all I can tell you. And I'm not alone, as u may know.

Anyway, though all these guys are different too, I'm more like, say, Marc Headley, Janis Grady, Terri Gamboa, etc. as to current beliefs and life's outlooks and orientations than say, you, Marty, and all who still are Scientologists both in belief (or philosophical outlook) and practice.

One thing we all (well, with the exception of those "out here" yet doing acts of treason by siding with, spying for, or getting blackmailed by DM or his lackies, in whatever sundry ways and forms) share is that we know what's really going on inside the C of S, how off-strategy it is admin wise, how out-tech it is tech wise, and needless to say (and the beginning of this sorry chain), how seriously out-ethics and abusive-to-the-extreme that it is. Also, we both know that there are many quite workable parts to Scn tech and admin, except those that are Scientologists still think that ALL of it is true, successful and effective and those of us who are no longer Scientologists believe that there are only parts of it that are so.  

And I'm telling u "all these things" as I wanted to answer u thoroughly, yet, so u know, I don't engage in what Scientologists call "natter", or go post such in the so-called natter boards and sites, or any such practices, as I consider them irrespectful of the beliefs of others, be it Scn or Buddhism or whatever. And I highly respect people like Marty Rathbun, Mike Rinder (just wrote him), etc. personally, and I also respect their beliefs and causes, though they may not be mine, and are not, for the most part. Like Mother Theresa used to say, just to paraphrase this point of view from one person: If u ask me to go to anti-war rallies, I won't. Yet if u ask me to go to Peace rallies, I will. And there IS a huge difference, if u get my drift in full, both at the  level of the mind and spirit of the individual(s) involved and the practice, doingness of each. U are free to have your own judgments about me, yet I'd advise u, if I may at all, to try n-o-t to judge and as much as possible, just respect and grant me beingness. I'll do the same, bud.  

Now, I ask u honestly, can u actually respect and live with all this, as the saying goes, without a) getting "all over it" (in either debate, antagonism, or proselitizing, etc.) or b) desires for alienation, disconnection or similar concepts, from me, and c) irrespectful behavior, vilifcation and so on? IF not, we maybe should not associate with each other; though that's n-o-t what I'm proposing or desire, so we're clear.

Anyway . . . I think u can, Jim, if u were to ask me, but I'm asking u now, as I've not been in touch with you for nearly 20 years (so don't mind the question pls, as I'm asking it earnestly, and without any bad intent, my friend). I only associate with those that meet the above three (loosely and briefly worded) "qualities" or beingnesses -- no matter where they're at at to their beliefs and practices (again, with the proviso that they're not DM peons, et al) and I've found that as long as true respect, love and care are there, there are no real problems in my relations with them, and they enrich and even liven up my life, in many, many ways.

Ciao for now, buddy. Lots of peace and well-being to you, yours and all your endeavors.  

Best, Xavier

==================================

Sent: December 15, 2009 11:40:33 PM CST

Dear Dan,

Understood. As a note, know that the near totality of this email is stated here for your sake and that of your "Independent Scientologist" cause, not for me.

As to getting back with me, that'd be good, Dan. I never heard back from Steve at all, and the lack of response, the lack of getting in touch and n-o-t confronting me straight and overtly is a very, very bad indicator per LRH basics, so it's not an attitude and demeanor that it's considered at all ethical or standard in admin or in tech application (in human relations, invest and ethics and justice matters, etc., etc.). I do know LRH tech and policy quite well, and so do u, so u know well what I mean). I had NOTHING against him, or his/your cause, nothing at all, until I heard about your and his vilification and spreading false rumors about me. Let this be quite clear, as I considered each of you as totally fine people.

VERY IMPORTANT TO GRASP: It's wasn't ethical for either of you to "hang" me, and publicly humiliate me to many of our mutual friends and acquaintances, just on what any court of law or true LRH Ethics or Justice procedure (be it a standard invest, an eval, a Board of Investigation, a Committe of Evidence, etc.) would, at best, call "circumstantial evidence", "hearsay", hypothesis or suppositions. Please be aware, with no justifications or not-isness, that what you and Steve (and/or whomever else) have done is not only a clear violation of VERY precise LRH tech, but a clear violation of the laws of the land as far as libel and slander --- all aside from quite a few of the points of the Universal Declaration of Human Rights.

And Dan, last but not least, Steve's and your vilification of me is not dis- similar to the type of unfounded witch hunts and totally unstandard "ethics" application that those who you protest and report about (DM, OSA, C of $), so please realize this, without justifying it at all please, and also know that, all aside from all this, you're going off-target when u do any of this, and on top of that, you're playing right into their hands, doing what DM, etc want u to do, which is fight amongst your own or your fellows, get distracted, loose the faith and/or support of some of your fellow Independent Scientologists, wasting the energy and resources that you could be using on exposing them.

So, Dan, I can only tell you that, for your own sakes, and that of your own peace of mind and conscience, it behooves that each of you clear up this matter in full, standarldy, ethically and humbly, and take whatever actions to make sure that all that each of you contacted passing on any vilifaction or black PR about me, is given the right information, with a genuine apology.

And don't think many are not questioning themselves about each of you, as I've nothing to do with Scn or Scientologists, and I've nothing to hide, and my friends and acquaintances, for the most part, know both ot these facts. And if either one of you considers himself ethical, as a Scientologist or not, it's imperative for your own beingness and integrity level, to truly and objectively confront and take what I've said b4 and in these paragraphs, quite seriously.

And I don't mean anything acusatory or demeaning by this, or anywhere here; I may be direct and so forth, but nothing here is meant to offend or degrade u, or Steve. They are just the hard facts of the matter, at least to my knowledge.  

Now, per what u just said in your email, you're still not sure as to me being a plant or not, all I can tell you again is that nothing could be further from the truth. It's so NOT what I am or what I'm into (seeing that I'm not even into Scientology for the most part, and though I do acknowledge that some parts of LRH's works are workable and useful, I stopped being and calling myself a Scientologist for over a year a half agom since May 2008, to be exact). 

I don't have any, and I do mean ANY relations with C of S public anymore (i.e. meaning those in "good standing" with the C of $), with no CL V org staff, and no SO service or management org staff, with NO one anywhere, and certainly not with RTC staff or Der Fuhrer DM, or any of his minions, whether they're outside of the SO or C of S, or not. Zilch, nada, nothing -- and I've absolutely NO reason to, no vested interest to do so, as I've no kids, no relatives I want to be in touch with, no money I want (I got it out), and last but not least, as gone over, I've ZERO interest in the Bridge or Scn. (But I do, FULLY respect those that do, and they should avail themselves of it by whatever means outside of the current C of S; and I consider them my friends too, as long as they're living ethical lives, and mutually respectful.)

So, whatever questions or comments of mine (during the time I called you, and the time I called Steve) either you or Steve, or both, took as a "red flag" weren't red flags at all, I can assure you, as I've NO interest in ANY- thing related to Scn or the C of S. And I wouldn't take a bribe or go to work for DM or any of his other hypnotized/faithful slaves if it was the last "job" available in the entire universe. Whatever comments or questions I had for either one of you were either out of sheer curiosity or, in some cases, shock and concern --- but it was genuinely that, and that alone, not whatever else got concocted. Your choise whether to believe me or not, but that is the truth.

In terms of you getting back to me, I suggest you email me if you'd like first, but that, after that, or instead of that, we either meet in person (as we live close to each other relatively) in some place central to both (or at your place, if u so prefer; either way is fine with me), or we at least phone each other.

Now, Dan, I must tell u my preference is in person, but I leave the options open. In case u don't have my cell phone to hand, it is: 310-___-____. Oh, if u do decide to meet in person, pls be so kind as to give me a 24-hour notice (and last but not least on this, for me it's better on the weekdays or evenings, not on the weekends, unless that's totally impossible for u, then I'll consider it --- and it doesn't have to be over a meal, though it can be).

Pls let me know and, again, thanks for getting back in touch with me at least briefly.   

Regards, Xavier

==================================

Sent: December 16, 2009 2:30 AM

Dear Jim,

Tks for your reply.

On using C of $, my apologies. I meant it as part of the current regime's main intention and so forth.

The answer to your question of what threw me off the Bridge does n-o-t have one anwer, it was several things over several years, really, and the finding of my invests into Scn, LRH, the SO, DM, and a number of related people and matters, all culminating into my final decision to stop being a Scientologist. This may not satisfy you as an answer, I know that, but I told you from my first email on these matters, that I did not consider it "email" type communication (or subject matter) and that it would take a long, long time for me to explain it in full to you.

Now, Jim, I'm well aware of the fact that all aside from whatever objective reasons (whys and other facts I saw as non-optimum), there was some out-tech, out-admin and out-ethics in my dealings with me (and I'm sure mine weren't 100% standard either), and I well know that the RPF, the SO and the entire Scn "culture" at this point is inside a huge bubble of very, very severe out tech, out-admin and out-ethics, so that the Standard Scn tech (admin and ethics) that exists amongst the public and staff is only there part of the time, if at all, and it's clouded by all the very UN- standard practices all around them. But believe me, I took all this very, very much into account before I made my final decision, and the "out tech on me" and/or "the sickeningly UN-standard environment of the current C of S public and staff" was not at all the major picture; in fact it was none of the major reason. The reason I stopped being a Scientologist and an adherent of LRH and his works is due to many, many fundamentals of his own writings and other works, and practices (even WAY before DM took over, in the Scientology of the 60s, the Sea Org of the 70's, and so forth).

So other than the little I covered in my email to you re this on Monday where I say "I'm not into anything that claims to have THE only salvation tech, or that claims to have THE only Source, and that is extremely "futuristic" as to its salvation and enlightenment approach. . . . " I can only tell u that I would only want to discuss this with you, or anyone, if at all, either on the phone or in person, and if so, it'd have to be in stages. So sorry if this is not what u want, yet I do respect that.

As to being in touch on the phone or via email, i.e. being in touch at all -- that's still up to you. Per your own comments, like your "first things first" comment when u first got back with me after I clarified who I was, and per the PS of your last email, I get the feeling that you just don't associate much with non-Scientologists or ex-Scientologists and only with Independent Scientologists (meaning besides the absolutely necessary associations of family, job and "getting around", that is).

So, Jimmy, if in fact the religion or religious inclination or what-not of the other person makes it a key point for you to associate closely with him or her, then that would not work with me, as I don't agree with such conditions and I could tell u a lot more about how I feel about that kind of attitude and so forth, but let's leave it at the fact that I don't condone it, practice it or approve of it, as it's simply not conducive to peace, whether personal or world peace, nor to true personal spiritual awakening, enlightenment or expansion. Unfortunately, it's one of the engrained aspects of LRH's beingness (in his words and actions, though not in ALL his words or actions) and Scientology itself that I saw and see as a HUGE outpoint and something totally off the mark of any true spirituality or religion.

Nonetheless, most organized religions are doing the same, or similar, I know. Thus I don't belong to any organized religion, and have been cultivating my own spirituality, reading and applying only independent [of cults or churches] authors, and my own intuition, insights and findings, after deep and objective inquiries.    That's all I can tell you at this time, and in this medium, Jim.

Yet know that, whatever u decide to do with our comm line due to these matters, you will always have a friend with me, no matter your leaning or lack thereof. And mi casa es su casa whenever you're in these parts.

And, please, don't u ever loose your sense of humor, buddy!  Take care and be well.

Warm Regards,   Xavier

==================================

Sent: December 16, 2009 10:52 PM

Dear Jim,

Tks for your response. I feel your care and concern and that's appreciated.

Touching on the different subjects of your email:

a) On Scn, like I've now said a couple of times, there wasn't one thing, yet many fundamentals of the subject matter (as illustrated in that same short paragraphs of my email on Monday; just with those ALONE, it was enough to leave the subject, all aside from all the others. And if you or anyone  actually finds the true research papers for any of LRH's findings and conclu- sions, if they even exist, then I at least would like to see them. But I well know that if they were impossible to find at the Int Base, then the likelihood of them existing is almost nil. To u it may seem that I've an incomplete eval or invest, and I totally respect your opinion, Jim, but to me, I've concluded the invest and short of talking about it here and there on the phone or in person with you or s/one whenever we have "too much time on our hands", or for amusement's sake, I have no desire to further discuss it, answer more questions about it on an email line (as gone over with you from the start), or debate it, u know. So u know, there's nothing personal here and I'm not upset or irritated at all, I'm just communicating to you freely on this matter.

As to plants, Steve thinking I'm a plant, Dan having suspicisions about it, etc.: Ultimately that's their problem. I've already conctacted those close friends that were/are my true friends and they know the truth that I'm not a plant or anything of the sort. It's so, SO out of my reality or desires to be one, that it's ludicrous, so all it tells me is that unfortunately Steve and Dan have gone effect of the "push back", as Dan called it in his email to me today, that DM and co. is suposedly doing to those speaking out about the abuses he's been doing.

Gone effect partially at least, as they're now more prone to believe some- thing like that re me, which means the pressure has been too much, the paranoia (or whatever u may want to call it) level has climbed to high and now I became the target of their suspicions and acusations and tormorrow, someone else who asks them questions or gives off some comments that they see as different or "strange" (and yes, I do think different than them, and trust me, so do quite a few others out here, as we're not into the war mentaility and we won't be, as we simply don't feel that's what we should or want to do with the rest of our lives; yet this does not mean we support or condone DM or his abuses either) will become their target, and so forth. Meanwhile DM and OSA will be high-fiving and laughing at them as to how they've gotten all this in-fighting and distractions really going, dividing and wasting their time and energies -- unfortunately.

To me, that's sad but true. At least that's the way I see it, and Janis and others have told them, and Marty, the same thing (in different words), so all I can say is in their own interest to wake up to what we've been trying to tell them re this irrational and nonsensical fueding behavior, as it is them, u guys the Independent Scientologists, who have much more to loose, not me. If I lost the appreciation of a handful of acquaintances due to Dan's or Steve's comments, so be it, no biggie at all at this point; my comm lines with my true friends is intact (verified as such) and everything in my life also is moving forward and well.

U, Steve or Dan can believe what u wish about me or plants, and the truth is the truth, no matter who believes what, and that's what really counts and it's good enough for me. It'd be a good DS practical for s/one to find out from each how they started "thinking I'm a plant", what datums or comments they put in the category of "evidence", what strings they suposedly pulled, which they left unpulled and so forth. 

But, Jim, who's got the time for that? And also they don't seem to want to be objective about it, at least in Steve's case, and so if they want to continue to "be right" and all that unflat Grade IV jazz, instead of being willing to see another reality (low position on the Chart, as u know) and to live by the truth and only the truth, then what can one do? I've told them to look, pleaded for them to do so repeatedly, but thus far they keep on not doing so (with Steve having the audacity of putting my name on an article on his website for a day or so before he took it off -- due to either too much pressure or because he came to his senses temporarily on this subject matter, knowing he had no true evidence).

Steve is acting like a kid, won't even respond to me at all on the matter, totally stuck on his own rightness and righteousness on this subject. That's quite sad. So that's about all I have to say on that subject matter, Jim, think what u may, do what u wish on it, per what u know and what u feel is right, and that''s that.

Gotcha on the long missives, point well taken, Jim. We all get on a roll about some things, as u know, so please excuse me for that; I'll work on it! :-)

Anyway, I don't know if I covered all the key points u brought up in your email but that's what I can tell you at this point. So again, I leave the choice of keep- ing the comm line with me up to you, Jim. Personally, I'm glad to have the comm line with you, as I always liked you (both in the "serious" part of life and the "fun" side of it), yet if we do keep it, it can't be one so as to revisit Scn or stuff like that, as that's not my gig, not my desire at all, as I feel done with it. So, if u can, and/or would like to have a comm line with me with the above facts and provisos, just let me know, Jim. As gone over, u'll always have a friend w/ me.

Regards, Xavier

==================================

Sent: December 17, 2009 1:14:43 AM CST

Dear Jim,
 
For whatever reason, you've chosen to respond violently and in an antagonistic form. That's your choice of course, but it's not something I invited, or the like, as I was not offending or attacking you. And also, I wasn't expecting you to "buy" anything of what I said, I simply expected you to respect it (different) and to make your own conclusions and keep your own counsel, and I told u that I would respect that. If u can't tolerate a divergent attitude and reality as to LRH or his works, then so be it. U're free to believe the "imbecile or plant" assumptions, if that satisfies you. I myself will simply respect your views, put this antagonistic comm from u aside, and always remember the real you, as really, that is all that counts.
 
Peace,
Xavier

==================================

Sent: December 17, 2009 3:44:19 AM CST

Dear Dan,

Thank for your email.

Today, the words of a true friend who told me after this happened that "no true friend would do this" finally and fully dawned on me. So, with no intention to offend you, or Steve, and using Scientologese to get my point across to all of you, I can tell you this in all honesty:

a) That is the is-ness of the matter to me ("no true friend would do this"),

b) My "mistake", if I in fact said or did anything to "cause" this vilification on me, was to think that you and Steve were friends and that as such you respected me for who I am, and did not draw a "party line" over ideology, religion or spiritual views - so long as I was not in DM's camp or forwarding his sickening and evil views and actions. Seeing what has taken place, despite the completely verifiable fact that I don't have any associations with DM, his minions or the C of S, and would never do their dirty work (not just out of integrity's sake but because, on top of that, I've no vested interest in it whatsoever, no gain at all), after a phone call to you and one to Steve some weeks ago --- I can see that this frienship that I thought existed, was not the case, or not anymore, if it ever really was.

Why? Simple: true friends don't act this way. If something "fishy" comes up, if something "strange" or "not ok" is said or done by one or the other, they get in touch with the other friend, they listen and they reason, as objectively as possible, they try to see their friend's reality, whether that was different than theirs or not. But no matter what, no matter if they agree or disagree, they at first grant beingness, they do their best to clarify, to fully pull the string f-u-l-l-y, to be fair, and to be willing to be "wrong", to be humble and non-righteous.

They don't go off rumor-mongering about their friend covertly or overtly, wether they did the above steps fully or not. There's plenty of LRH PLs and HCOBs, and other LRH writings and tapes, that point out what I'm pointing out here. HCO PL Justice and HCO PL Injustice, HCOB You Can Be Right, HCO PL An Old Poem, etc., etc., not to mention the ones that point out how to do a standard investigation, eval or judgment of any kind. There's also basic decency and fairness. 

None of these references, and plenty of others, were adhered to by either Steve nor you, before you guys decided that "I was a plant" or "probably a plant." None of you ever got with me to ask, truly investigate or clarify anything, and at least Steve, did not even answer comms from me or several others on this matter, and just decided "to be right". Please don't take these as attacks, they'r'e facts, whether u care to admit to that or not.   

c) Though I don't side with DM or his abuses and see their atrocity, and never have or will side with such, I always try not to take "ideological sides" with my friends (as to who is an "LRH Tech believer" or who is not, etc.), and instead I respect each of them, no matter their religous, spiritual or other views. I only "take sides" in matters that to me have nothing to do with ideology or true spirituality, but with basic human rights and the abuses thereof, and so I don't associate or consider someone a friend if he/she is siding with DM or his minions and the current C of S, or if he/she is siding with any other opressor, dictator or violator of human rights in ANY sphere. Let that be clear.

d) I realize that this vilification of me, and whomever else will be the next wrong target, cannot be fought or protested about the way I had been doing (expressing my outrage of the false charge of treason and at the same time, urging u guys to get in comm and apply standard basics of comm, ethics and invest/eval tech), as no matter what I say or do, which is/was only done for my own defense (and I do have that basic right, last time I checked), will, or might, be interpreted as "noise", "natter" or "applying the third party law backwards", etc., etc. (as probably some actual plants are in fact doing, I believe you, so the A=A=A as to what I am/was doing due to the shock of being attacked for something I am not, is, unfortunately, much too easy to fall into).

Now u have others falling for the same A=A=A as a result of you spreading this false rumor about me, people like "Archer", like "Battering Ram" in the comments sections below Marty's last article (which is, needless to say, a good article and with a great LRH quote). Despite the call to reason of "Bingo", on that same blog thread, me exercising the basic human right to defend myself (and actually be confronted with the charges and whatever you guys are imagining or calling evidence to that effect) is being seen as something else. SO, I'll simply let you guys be. If "stepping all over" me, or "defaming" me satisfies your need to have someone "guilty", so be it. I've the support and love of my true friends and a big family, and I've also got my health, my own spirituality and integrity, and that's more than enough, as it's true wealth, so I'll just continue to flourish and prosper.

Keep in mind, no matter what u may think or may have thought about me, that a) I've no beef with your religous views or beliefs, and b) I don't wish you ill, never did, never will; and that instead, despite all that's transcurred, I wish u nothing but peace in your heart and true prosperity, in all that you desire. And I mean this. (See my PS below.)

Love,   Xavier  

PS. I trust the above does answer your question, Dan. If it doesn't, feel free to ask me again, or whatever you deem appropriate and objective. Yet my answer to your question is there, mostly under what I said under point "b)" above, re what true friends are and do, so that would answer your question as to what would end cycle on this for real, or what would've ended cycle on this much earlier.

Yet speaking frankly and realistically as to the "now" of this scene . . . At this point, seeing what's been done by Steve since Friday, not to arrest or seek the truth standarldy and ethically, but to "intensify" the vilification of me by various other means, seeing his silence to my communications to him, and your minimal responses, I simply don't see either of you doing those things that a true friend would do, I don't even see you doing the standard actions that your own LRH policy and tech clearly cover, so I will let it all be and move on, and let each of you, with your own conscience and with your own LRH policy and tech references, decide what your actions should be in this matter and any other ones like it. It's your integrity. I now know who my true friends ex-SO friends are, and that's quite a blessing in fact. May you find the truth, and live by it, always.  

Amen, and peace, once and for all, Dan and Steve. Best to both.  

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Sent: December 17, 2009 4:40:52 AM CST

Dear Dan,

I don't disagree with that you're saying here. But let me tell you, I did not start this war, it was you and Steve that did. I simply got loud and, shocked about this "serious" and false accusation on me, reacted to it (and yes, I can see my own wrongnesses and can admit to over- reacting to it; see my answer to your other email for more on that).

U'd have to know me more, as others do, yet I'm very emotional on the subject of friends and things of the sort, and that can be a 2-edge sword sometimes, and I never, for the life of me, would've thought that u guys would even remotely, remotely think, much less accuse me, of being a plant. It was and is a real shocker, that's all I can say. I considered both of you friends, buddy, and so this really offended me. This is not a crime, last I checked, Dan. The higher the ARC the lower the fall . . . loosely paraphrasing LRH.

So please don't judge or condemn me for my reaction, as I can only tell you that if these false accusations were levied on you, and publicly on top of it, and by people who u though were true friends and who you've known for 2 or more decades (!), u really, really couldn't predict or tell who y-o-u would take it, and how you would react; not until it happens.

Having said that, what you propose, both for me to do and for you to do is fine. Point well taken as to what a Course in Miracles goes over and on that PDC tape reference; thank you.

Yet, if u were to ask me as to what would truly be taking full responsibility for it, would be to write an actual article about it. U can make the part about me be a small part of the article, and actually stress and detail what really does matter most, things like:

a) All Independent Scientologists must abide to fully and standardly apply the tech they're espousing, not bits and pieces of it, while negating the greater and key parts of them (as was done here),

b) Do whatever they possibly can to remain objective, and to not go effect of DM's (or anybody else's) suppression and "push-back", by going on generalities, hearsay, pieces of suposed "fishy or odd" strings, etc., etc., in negation of the entire Data Series and a ton of the Mgmt Series, Vol O, Ethics Specialist Course refs. and the like.

What Marty pointed out in his brief article (before the LRH quote) may be correct as to what these actual plants are doing, but it's incomplete, because I also see a need for you guys to be stressed what you guys should be/do in light of all this, and always, Dan. U could make it very clear that in-fighting, third-party and witch-hunts amongst us is one of the very things DM and his group of cowards and evil doers wants us to be engaging in, so the Independent Scientologist movement is distracted, reduced and so on. The key thing all need to get is the importance of going on with your mission, your cause, staying on target fully, being  fully standard in one's life, and to disregard and not get distracted by suposed OR real plants.

If u know LRH policy and LRH EDs for Management's use, what I'm telling u is very similar to what LRH said for orgs to do when attacked, and even what to do to an individual in such cases. Going forward is  the key. And last but not least, if u guys don't have a clear and precise strategy that you've formulated and are adhering to, you're also negating a huge part of LRH's Admin/Management tech, and you'll get dispersed.

I could go on, but I think u get the picture. The above provisos and frame of mind (On-Source, independent and non-PTS or paranoid -- as Marty's recent article and LRH reference point out) are quite vital to the survival and success of the Independent Scientologist movement. So you would kill two birds with one stone if u wrote the above. And that would prove to one and all that you're taking full responsibility for it all, me and your movement, for real. I really can't overestimate how important stressing the points above is to your own cause, I couldn't stress it enough.

Up to you, and Steve, Marty, etc. on what you do, though, of course. And again, I do, despite what Steve and you have done, wish u the best, across the boards --- truly so.

Regards,   Xavier

PS. And one of these fine days, Dan, I would like u to tell me how on earth you guys "got going" on this whole concoction, and I believe that, per LRH policy and per basic human rights, I do have a right to know. Even if I were guilty I'd have a right to know, per both LRH and the Western World's policies and laws (and u know that, Dan), so I would appreciate it if u grant me that right, at some point. I'm holding u to it, Dan. :-)  

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Sent: December 17, 2009 5:00:23 AM CST

Dear Jim,

I got your opinion. I've answered Dan and told him what I truly thought re what he said and suggested.
 
Now, please take this for what it IS, and not anything else, with no justifiers:

I kindly ask you to fully get off my communication lines at this point, as the HE&Ry and offensive reaction that u had in your prior email was completely uncalled for and unjustifiable, and I personally do not approve of it and will not allow it on my lines. If u think that I, or anyone else on this earth, deserves or should be given what u spout it, you are simply not being true to yourself, much less LRH and his works, in my honest opinion. But that's just my own opinion, u can do as u wish with others, yet not with me, not anymore. If u don't have it in you to apologize (with true remorse, from the heart) for your response, then so be it, as it's your life, case and future, and u know that. Any further comms from you will be sent to Spam and deleted. Realize that though I opine the above, I must definitely have no ill will towards you, not now, not ever.

Best of luck on your Bridge and in life.

Regards,
Xavier

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Sent: Thursday, December 17, 2009 7:00 AM

Dear Jim,
 
I got your opinion. I've answered Dan and told him what I truly thought re what he said and suggested.
 
Now, please take this for what it IS, and not anything else, with no justifiers:
 
I kindly ask you to fully get off my communication lines at this point, as the HE&Ry and offensive reaction that u had in your prior email was completely uncalled for and unjustifiable, and I personally do not approve of it and will not allow it on my lines. If u think that I, or anyone else on this earth, deserves or should be given what u spout it, you are simply not being true to yourself, much less LRH and his works, in my honest opinion. But that's just my own opinion, u can do as u wish with others, yet not with me, not anymore. If u don't have it in you to apologize (with true remorse, from the heart) for your response, then so be it, as it's your life, case and future, and u know that. Any further comms from you will be sent to Spam and deleted. Realize that though I opine the above, I must definitely have no ill will towards you, not now, not ever.
 
Best of luck on your Bridge and in life.
 
Regards,
Xavier

==================================

Sent: Thursday, December 17, 2009 7:27 AM

Got it, yet when u "communicate" the way u did, saying what u said and how u said it, Jim, u know you're not really communicating, either. U know those LRH references too, Jim. U know that what u did was unjustifiable, and yet, it seems that for u to truly see this and take action on it, takes a somewhat long while, if at all. So, as LRH also points out, to choose to refuse to be in touch with someone that one feels is being abusive or who one simply does not want to be communicated from for any reason, is a basic human right. And that's all I was exercising with you. And if you're not going to take full responsibility for your prior abusive words, well so be it but don't expect me to hang around your communication lines. I hope u can understand and respect this. That's all.
 
Regards,
Xavier